Since we have no clue whether Marvin Greene was or wasn't gay, it seems that's we're compelled to take a Broadway musical turn toward a Tony winning show: "Avenue Q" -- which is challenging political correctness all over the globe.

Let's start with the lyrics to "If You Were Gay" from that show:

<Spoken Dialog/Intro>

ROD
Aah, an afternoon alone with my favorite book,
"Broadway Musicals of the 1940s."
No roommate to bother me.
How could it get any better than this?

NICKY
Oh, hi Rod!

ROD
Hi Nicky.

NICKY
Hey Rod, you'll never guess what happened to
me on the Subway this morning.
This guy was smiling at me and talking to me

ROD
That's very interesting.

NICKY
He was being real friendly, and I think he was coming on to me.
I think he might've thought I was gay!

ROD
<Clears throat> So, uh, why are you telling me this?
Hmm? Why should I care?
I don't care.
What'd ya have for lunch today?

NICKY
Oh, you don't have to get all defensive about it, Rod...

ROD
I'm NOT getting defensive!
Why do I care about some gay guy you met, okay?
I'm trying to read.

NICKY
Oh, I didn't mean anything by it, Rod.
I just think it's something we should be able to talk about.

ROD
Well, I don't want to talk about it, Nicky!
This conversation is over!

NICKY
Yeah, but...

ROD
OVER!!!

NICKY
Well, okay, but just so you know —

<sung>
If you were gay
That'd be Okay.
I mean 'cause, hey,
I'd like you anyway.
Because, you see,
If it were me,
I would feel free
To say that I was gay
(But I'm not gay.)

ROD
Nicky, please!
I am trying to read....
What?!?

NICKY
If you were queer....

ROD
Ah, Nicky!

NICKY
I'd still be here,

ROD
Nicky, I am trying to read this book.

NICKY
Year after year

ROD
Nicky!

NICKY
Because you're dear to me.

ROD
Argh!

NICKY
And I know that you

ROD
What?

NICKY
Would accept me, too...

ROD
I would?

NICKY
If I told you today,
"Hey! Guess what? I'm gay!"
(But I'm not gay.)
I'm happy
Just being with you.

ROD
High Button Shoes, Pal Joey...

NICKY
So, what what should it
Matter to me
What you do in bed
With guys?

ROD
Nicky, that is GROSS!

NICKY
No, it's not!
If you were gay
I'd should hooray!

ROD
I am not listening!

NICKY
And here I'd stay,

ROD
La la la la la!

NICKY
But I wouldn't get
In your way.

ROD
Aaaah!

NICKY
You can count on me
To always be
Beside you every day,
To tell you it's okay,
You were just born that way.
And, as they say,
It's in your DNA
You're gay!

ROD
I AM NOT GAY!

NICKY
If you were gay.

ROD
Argh!

And to let you see Rod and Nicky in action on this tune, let's watch the Aussie cast take a go at it. There's a digital glitch in the host's introduction, but the song goes off without a hitch:

Avenue Q Australia - If You Were Gay



Prefer watching the original Broadway cast? Lucky you!... Someone smuggled a video camera into the theater. Gotta love the end of the video: after the song ends, the person is holding the camera while applauding.

Patti

That was very entertaining! Thanks for posting.

Mark

You heard it here from Mark Mori!

Due to Bettie's fans' fervent interests in her relationship with Armon Walterson, not to mention requests for Armon-focused photos, Mark assured readers of this Forum that he took out his very special research shovel and went digging into history.

As part of that dig, he went to journalist John L. Guerra, who wrote the 2009 article about Bettie in Key West, titled "Local Preacher Saved Pinup Queen's Life."

Posted here: http://keysnews.com/node/9785

The claim that Bettie was suicidal on New Year's Eve was made by a preacher named Wright. He was clueless who Bettie was when originally contacted by Greg Theakston during the days of THE BETTY PAGES. With ramped up media attention and requests for interviews, Wright went from not knowing Bettie to having a detailed tale about saving her from suicide.

Was Wright's savior story right? Check it out for yourself!

Mark gave Guerra an exclusive on sections of Bettie's interview about her Key West life. The goal: beat the bushes for photos of Armon, and get info from his family -- and others -- about Bettie living with the Conches (slang for Key West residents).

So far, Armon's cousin, Paulie, responded by agreeing to send a photo, and committed to get others to share the secrets they've kept for decades.

For now, read Guerra's latest Bettie article:

http://keysnews.com/node/24947

Florida Keys News

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Interview unravels Key West lore
New documentary corrects some Bettie Page myths

BY JOHN L. GUERRA Citizen Staff

An adjunct to the latest Bettie in Key West article mirrors Bunny Yeager's 1976 "in search of Bettie" attempt. This one targets Armon Walterson.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Posted here:
http://keysnews.com/node/24982

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

FLORIDA KEYS

Filmmaker seeks photos

Photographs of Bettie Page with her former husband, Armon Walterson -- or Walterson by himself -- are being sought for a documentary about the famous pinup girl who once lived in Key West.

Page was married to Walterson in 1957 when she lived here.

Filmmaker Mark Mori, one of the last people to interview Page before her death in 2008, is producing a documentary entitled "Bettie Page Bears All."

Mori can be contacted at 212-877-0802 or Single Spark Pictures, 142 West End Ave., 21st Floor, Suite M, New York, N.Y. 10023.